Thursday, January 06, 2011

35 to 50

I didn't manage to read 50 books in 2010 as I wanted to. 


I thought 50 books were not that difficult to complete but I suppose a lot of things got in the way. I am quite happy with 35, to be frank. It's still a big number - even for me. 


This year, I am trying to hit 50. I have started a book this morning. What better way to start the drive with my favorite author. It's pretty thick - 603 pages with very, very fine prints.


I think I need to start wearing reading glasses or something. My vision has started to impair due to the many readings and of course, the way I read.


So here's to 50 books to read this year - cheers!

Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Of Being Your True Self

I just realized that I am not over My Sister’s Keeper by Jodi Picoult.


The story moved me; that is sort of a given thing but there is one more thing that I kept thinking about.


The character Julia in the book was portrayed as bold, independent and strong.


I sometimes wonder what happened to me. I used to not care about what people say about me. The short-cropped hair did nothing to ease the talking, so were the t-shirts and pants. The only time I would wear a baju kurung was on the first say of raya, for the first half of the day. That was it. On any other day, I would eat, act and behave like a boy. Back then, I was in control. I decided on the who, where, how, why and when.


Who I am right now is nothing like who I was back then. I care about what people say about me. I tried several times to be who I wanted to be but more often that not, was given ‘the look' for not conforming that I stopped trying and sink in society’s standards. The standard that sucks, by the way. It defines society – maybe, but it’s doing a lot of harm to individuality.


Maybe this is how split-personality started.