Tears of Anguish

The team was in the Board Room today, meeting with the directors and CEO. It was ugly. Melissa had a fight with Katak. Jesse (the CEO) was practically shouting at us and told us to stop fighting with each other. Like we care. Katak was way out of line this time. She deserved the yelling rather than us.

We tried hard to back ourselves. We fought for justice but it didn’t do us any good. Along the line, Jesse said that the team must be replaced. We are the reason why the project is slipping. We are the reason why the client kept on coming back with endless reviews. We are the reason why the project is a disgrace.

I had wanted to say so much to him and Katak, especially. Jesse said we need to do things a certain way and we should have known it from the start. Only problem is, we don’t know nuts about it and nobody ever told us till this very day. Whose fault is that? Still ours? Please don’t question about our commitment towards the project. We would do whatever it takes to finalize this and deliver the services. But all of that will not happen if u don’t support and trust us. We operate based on trust. No matter what it is, we will do our job and get it done. If the client wanted to do more than just delay, it’s really out of our hands. How can we push the client when she’s only one person doing all three countries? We will push her for the things that she owes us but she can only deliver so much. Yes, it’s the client’s problem but we have to understand her problems and help to make things easier for her. Haven’t u people heard of a WIN-WIN situation? I guess not. That explains why u guys are such a**es.

Jesse asked me if I have anything to say. I didn’t see a point of voicing out my opinion any longer. It’s a waste of time and breath. In fact nobody said anything after the mentioning of replacing the team. We just lost our security blanket. Just like that.

We left the room 2 hours later.

We were very pissed with Katak and Jesse. Not to mention si Belang. She did nothing to back us up as a team nor tried to defend us. What kind of a project manager is that?

I regretted the fact that I did not say the things I wanted to say to Katak and Jesse. I just couldn’t take it anymore. Especially the smug look on Katak’s face. I won’t forget that face. Ever. Enough is enough. I was so pissed that I couldn’t contain it any longer. I was all hot inside and was trying hard to control myself but I just lost it. Instead of screaming my lungs out, I broke down. Hot, angry tears wasted on such unfortunate event. Amoi and Melissa were there to comfort me. Thanks to both of them. I couldn’t ask for better friends than u guys. Not fogetting Giggsy. She sent out an e-mail asking us all to stay strong. You guys are the best. We've known each other for less than 4 months (except for Giggsy) but we've been through a lot together. Thick and thin. I love you guys. No matter what.

We're starting to contact our friends and all. We’re getting out of this hellhole as soon as we can, if possible. There’s just no point of staying when Jesse has made it clear that he doesn't need nor want us.

By the way, Katak called me for a little discussion. She started off complimenting me before coming to the real point of the meeting. She wanted me to stay away from Melissa so that I won’t be influenced and see her as a bad person. Too late. You are a bad person and nothing could change that. I don’t need anybody to influence me on that. You are what you are.

Thank God nothing happened to me on my way home. I wasn’t paying much attention to the road. I could’ve easily hit the car before me and still not notice it. I was totally distracted. Totally.

Any of you guys need some HR people?