Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I'm Not a Perfect Person

I have a lot to say but I couldn’t find the words. The right words.

I guess I’m hitting pretty low right now.

Managing a crappy project, no specific job scope and not knowing if the new arrangement for my department is official at any point. I don’t even know if we are actually needed in the company. Legal department was just dissolved last week.

Things are weird and awkward and crappy between the Dutchman and myself. I hate that we’re not talking like we used to.

I have 2 best buds that made me laugh everyday but when we bid goodbye and parted ways, I was back to feeling down and crappy inside.

Everyone’s career is blossoming while mine is just dull. Arid. Boring. Uninteresting.

It’s funny though. No matter how much I hated Bossy Boss back then, I absolutely loved my job.

It’s also funny that I was truly passionate about my job back in VS despite the commotions.

It’s weird that I have a great boss but I don’t have that much interest for my job.

Should I be looking for a new job then? But that would mean leaving good friends behind. I hate that thought. Especially when I am very selective and picky when it comes to friends. Not because I’m smug but because I am very careful on where I plant my trust.

The world is unfair. I get that.

Pretty much everything is crappy at the moment but the washroom at my level is back to normal after a month of riot.

Ah. Life is balanced once more.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Arn,

All d best! Don't be too sad. Well sometimes you just need to give in something in order to earn something.If you think you neeed to move on with your career, don't hesitate. I'm sure you will always be i contact with your buddies no matter where you go. Take care

Aske'

Spena said...

Arn, I know how you feel. Great people,great job, bad bosses. And because of that , I just lost my job. I'm just hoping there is a blessing with all this happenings!

The Star Gazer said...

Aske',
i guess u're right in a way. Our own state-of-mind before others kan?

Cik Spena,
tell me about it! Arghh!! I'm still waiting for the blessing to happen. It's been in disguise for far too long now.