I'm Not a Perfect Person

I have a lot to say but I couldn’t find the words. The right words.

I guess I’m hitting pretty low right now.

Managing a crappy project, no specific job scope and not knowing if the new arrangement for my department is official at any point. I don’t even know if we are actually needed in the company. Legal department was just dissolved last week.

Things are weird and awkward and crappy between the Dutchman and myself. I hate that we’re not talking like we used to.

I have 2 best buds that made me laugh everyday but when we bid goodbye and parted ways, I was back to feeling down and crappy inside.

Everyone’s career is blossoming while mine is just dull. Arid. Boring. Uninteresting.

It’s funny though. No matter how much I hated Bossy Boss back then, I absolutely loved my job.

It’s also funny that I was truly passionate about my job back in VS despite the commotions.

It’s weird that I have a great boss but I don’t have that much interest for my job.

Should I be looking for a new job then? But that would mean leaving good friends behind. I hate that thought. Especially when I am very selective and picky when it comes to friends. Not because I’m smug but because I am very careful on where I plant my trust.

The world is unfair. I get that.

Pretty much everything is crappy at the moment but the washroom at my level is back to normal after a month of riot.

Ah. Life is balanced once more.