Being Me

I have been working in Alaska the whole of this week. At least that’s how it felt in the office. I think it’d be great to be assigned to Alaska. I’ve never been there nor experienced hyperthermia. It’d be cool, don’t you think?

There are a couple of news that I’d like to blog about.

Dol is leaving and it’s truly unexpected and hard for me to accept. He’s sort of my best friend and a brother all dolled up in one not-so-tall person. I was planning to groom him to be my successor and take my place when I move on to the PM group. I guess that couldn’t come quick enough for him. Plus he was offered much more than what he’s making right now. A lot more. I tried to persuade him to stay but he’s pretty determined to go. Especially when we couldn’t top the offer he’s getting. That’s the sad bit, you see. I can pretty much help him with work matters but remuneration is something that’s out of my hands. I am deeply sad and most of all, disappointed.

I guess I have to tell myself to be happy for him. If he’s really not happy working in I*G, then probably leaving is the answer. I can’t force him to stay. I want to but I can’t. But I want to.

I hate it even more because now I have to take over his project. If there’s anything I hate about project, it’s audit projects. Urgh! This particular one has to be done by 15th of November. Now I have to start reading the project materials and understand the head, body and tail. I have to act like I know the project inside out when I start

So now I have to manage 2 audit projects. Double yuck! I am nearing my resource capacity limit for August and November with tasks for just these 2 projects. I had to drop another system enhancement project to ensure I don’t go overboard with my resource capacity.

So anyways, work is just work. It will never end.

On the other hand, I have not been myself for the past few weeks. I often missed work because I couldn’t even muster the energy to get ready for work. I had to share with the Dutchman of the problems that I’m facing and lucky me, he (tried to) understand my problems. So that’s pretty much covered.

I am trying to be strong and brave through the days when I couldn’t even stand for long. Some people just don’t understand the battle I’m going through and it saddens me that those are the people I loved.

Doesn’t matter. I couldn’t care less what other people want to say. It is me who’s trying with all my might to be up and about. It is still me suffering from all the pains and stuff. Why bother what others want to say?

For those making fun of what I’m going through, do remember that this pain is not exclusively mine. If He wants to test you, He will bestow upon you the same pain, if not worse.

Now I have to remember not to eat for sahur tomorrow morning. Will be doing some blood work with the doctor first thing tomorrow.

Oh, I hope it’s not too late to wish you all Salam Ramadhan and Selamat Berpuasa.